How not to write emails!

Can you believe this?

I just received an email from someone. [Fortunately, it was identified as SPAM and was in the spam folder.] It read something like this:

Hi Scraped Apac,

Wanted to check in again and see if you had any further interest in exploring your current online presence. Happy to pull together an analysis which will look at some of the following:

1. blah blah blah

2.

3.

This is from a company that provides executive online reputation management & talent branding solutions from New York.

It sucks. Really.

1. It’s a spam email.

2. No personalization. What do you know about me? You are saying you are doing online reputation management. Don’t you eat your own dog food?

3. No proper introduction.

4. Just saying “Hi Kannan” is definitely not personalization. Saying just Hi or Hi Kannan doesn’t make any difference. But saying “Hi Scraped Apac Guy” definitely does make a huge difference. It made me sit up and take note of your email. Good work. Keep it up. I googled your company to see what you are doing in the world. But one thing is for sure: I will never give you an opportunity. You lost it even before you spoke to me.

5. Poor copy-writing.

6. Many mistakes in the language.

7. This is exactly called “spray & pray” technology in the world of email marketing.

This sucks.

But it does tell me the kind of opportunities that exist in the market. That’s the bright side. What do you say?

Cold calling? Talk to me. I will give you tons of ideas to do it right. Or I will point you in the right direction.

Happy Selling!